Wednesday, April 12. 2006wFAG vs. wGAYDay One It's around 8:30 a.m. and I'm in the weight room of the Long Island City YMCA. As you can probably guess, the Y is pretty no-frills (and not at all like that scene in The Village People's Can't Stop the Music), so there's no The music selecting gods of the YMCA aren't having any of that this morning, though, so it's energetic hip-hop that's fueling our workouts. Or it would be, if radio stations actually played music anymore (remember life before the evils of Clear Channel?). So instead of busting rhymes, we're listening to a bunch of dumbass radio personalities interviewing Juvenile whose offerring some farily interesting perspectives on this year's Mardi Gras in his native New Orleans. Not that you can hear what he's saying because Mr. Radio Personality just keeps on saying the word "faggot." That's right: fag this, fag that, damn faggots with all their faggotry faggoting all around the fag-o-sphere (he never said fag-o-sphere, that was me). Juvenile is barely responding to the rampant homophobia, more intent on trashing the tourists who were acting like they were doing so much to help New Orleans when really they were just being loud and getting hammered. But all Mr. Radio Personality can say is, "Faggoty, fag, fag, fag." Everyone in the weight room kind of looks at me uncomfortably. I'm not friends with them, but there are a rotating set of about 10 people that always workout before the old 9 to 5. I never realized that they all knew I was queer, but I guess they do. One man - not a regular - is laughing his gay-hating ass off. Not literally, unfortunately for him, because he has a lot of ass to lose. Day Two A week later it's weight time again, and I'm back at the YMCA. Still no DJ, still no floppy '70's men pumping iron as Olympic medalists and cop costumed queers sing disco. But at least the radio isn't playing anti-homo radio. Today it's distinctly pro-homo. Not in a clubby, gay-positive dance kind of way. Instead it's one of those pop stations with a whole studio full of radio personalities that tell jokes, play pranks, talk about insane or ridiculous news items. You know what I'm talking about. And what's the topic of today's waste-lots-of-time-don't-play-music-and-pay-royalties-just-bridge-the-gaps-between-commercials conversation? How many gay friends do you have? "I have five gay friends and two lesbians." "I know three gay guys and six lesbians." "Aw, man, I suck. I only have one gay friend who's, like, close. I barely know any other gay people and no lesbians." One guy loves his lesbian couple friends, because he feels like he can talk honestly about women with them (although he is concerned that they always seem to be cruising other women even though they're already paired up). One woman, of course, loves to frequent gay clubs with her friends, because she doesn't have to worry about getting hit on. One guy knows lots of gay men, but no lesbians, and can't figure out why. Everyone in the weight room kind of looks at me and smiles. Don't I feel comforted and accepted and not at all objectified or token-like? Isn't it so much better to be a crowd of straight people's accessory - a symbol of their open-mindedness and progressiveness - instead of being openly and irrationally despised? I mean, sure: I guess it's better. But by how much? Trackbacks
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Well said (wGay, wFag). But what does it take for sanity to be the norm? There was an interesting book written years ago by a prominent sociologist called "The Culture of Narcissism" which used as an example such a pathetic state of affairs as you describe, namely the self-satisfaction with which people reward themselves for what should be commonplace forms of thought and behavior, and he specifically used the "acceptance" of homosexuality as an example of this (I am fairly certain the author of this book was straight - just highly intelligent). I don't know if you're an academic (I certainly am not) but I think you are doing an excellent job. I shall keep reading.
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2006-04-13 23:25
I haven't read the book, but I did find this review online (http://www.policyreview.org/oct05/rosen.html) and am very intrigued. Thanks for the tip!
Thanks for the compliments. I am not an academic - just a loudmouth. My first boyfriend, however, was an academic, and if you've ever thought about dating one, I'd recommend staying away from most of them 
Oh, Lasch, for fuck's sake. feh.
Much as I value the concept of narcissism, I am slowly coming to realize that everyone and their mother-in-law is capable of using it to further their own sociopolitical worldview. Bush is a narcissist. Clinton's a narcissist. Neocons are narcissists. Liberals are narcissists. I'm a narcissist, you're a narcissist, wouldn't you like to be a narcissist, too--but enough about you, what do you think of mememe? If you're interested in political psych, I'd recommend more Erich Fromm, or Robert Jay Lifton. As for the "some of my best friends are"--meh. I remember a former friend (eventually she just got on my nerves too much) who was telling me with her typical wide-eyed dramatic way of speaking, how she knew FIVE transsexual people, FIVE. And I was all to myself, that's nice; I wonder if it's as exciting for them as it is for you? Later she tried to fix me up with a lesbian pal of hers, I think on account of we had so much in common--you know, we both liked pussy. She was very put out when no sparks flew, I think (nice girl, but no chemistry). "I tried." fuck off. |
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DJ spinning music. There isn't even one of those pre-recorded, dance hits of the 90's workout CDs. No, no - all we get at the Y are morning radio shows, which is usually just fine. Especially these days since 
